20 Reasons why Houston sucks

1. The Way it is designed – Houston is one of the most poorly designed cities in the country.

The weirdest images to come from Houston's lack of zoning laws

Houston is the only major U.S city without any zoning laws. It has a type of laxness that is reminiscent to the structure of third world countries. Because of that people can just build anywhere. Houston has multiple downtowns scattered all over the place, you will have a parking garage next to a home, and no sidewalks anywhere. This is the worst place in the world to be a pedestrian. That is why the neighborhoods lack any character, the only difference between most neighborhoods in Houston is their names.

2. Boring and dull

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Houston feels like a big town or suburb, rather than a major city. Houston  lacks an identity. It has no defining geography or uniqueness. Houston is an intensely boring city. There’s nothing you could tell a visitor they must see. No real attractions. Very spread out. In addition to that Houston and its surrounding areas have flat ugly scenery. If there is one thing that I think contributes to Houston’s boringness more than anything, is its unwalkability. Houston is one of the most unwalkable cities ever, everyone is in their car. Public transport is virtually nonexistent. In fact out of all the top 10 largest metros in the country, Houston is the only Metro without any elevated or underground rail, exacerbated by the fact that everything is 30 minutes away, and traffic is really bad. In addition, during the summer Houston is extremely hot and humid. Getting into the 100s. In fact in 2011, temperatures hit almost as high as 109 degrees (fahrenheit), with a humidity that is unreal. It’s like being in a sauna with your clothes on. The air suffocates you like a wet smelly blanket. You can’t go outside and there is no reason to! there is nothing to do outside. So you don’t see most people outside in Houston unless they have to be.

Here’s a joke Houston is so boring I heard the U.S government is deploying a special task  force to find something actually fun to do in this city.

Houston is so boring it makes the Sahara Desert look like a theme park.

Finding something fun to do in Houston is like trying to find food in a Venezualan supermarket.

Houston’s poor overall city planning results in a situation where 1. almost no one has an incentive to visit and 2. what visitors do come get a bad impression. Houston’s leadership has largely failed to generate a solid basis for Houston to become a place to visit. There are very few socially-active young single professionals. They definitely exist (according to the Census) but the city hasn’t really begun to service them yet.

Most social life seems to revolve around school and church – usually among people who already have children. The bars don’t have much of a Friday Happy Hour culture with most professionals facing a strenuous commute home.

3. Natural Disasters and screwed up weather- Houston is the most disaster prone Major U.S City.

Hurricanes, tornados, floods, heat waves, Houston has it all.

Houston is also prone to extreme weather. 108 degree summers and 19 degree winters.

You have a truly higher than reasonable chance of your house being completely ruined by flooding and/or hurricane damage, not unless its broken into first. See part 5 for better explanation why

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4. Homeless People Everywhere

Information from the 2014 Houston Homeless Count indicates that on a given night there are approximately 5,351 homeless persons in our area according to the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development’s (HUD) definition of homelessness, including 2,291 people living unsheltered and 3,060 living in sheltered facilities. It is important to note that this number is down 37% from 2011.

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5. Public Transportation sucks – Of the top 10 largest U.S Metros Houston is the only city that doesn’t have a sizable rail system.They refuse to create a useable pWaublic transit system. The reason being oil is a big part of the economy and they have more car dealerships than necessary. 175 to be exact.

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6. Crime in Houston – Houston has the 3rd highest amount of murders in the United States after Baltimore and Chicago

So the question is why?

Houston is a boomtown and many people here have moved here from somewhere else from crime ridden cities like New Orleans or crime ridden countries south of the border. Predatory people are attracted to living in areas where there are plenty of strangers and where the police won’t notice new faces as much. Additionally, there’s a booming drug trade in the city and plenty of customers with money. Whenever there’s a town where the economy is built a cycle of feast or famine, there’s going to be crime.

Houston is a drug and prostitution hub as well. Houston has about had 9,597 burglaries annually, he city’s “breathtakingly large surface area” makes it hard for police to effectively patrol and helps criminals disappear from crime scenes. Dr. Everette Penn, professor of criminology at UH–Clear Lake, similarly notes that the “sheer number of opportunities”—thousands of banks and ATMs spread across the city, and the distance armored cars must drive to service them—could account for the elevated statistics.

Another factor that seems to play a role is the multiplicity of freeways. Plotting all 30 robberies doesn’t show any geographic correlation (aside from a small cluster near Greenspoint), but most took place within a couple blocks of a freeway—and frequently near the intersection of two major arteries, upping the potential avenues for a quick getaway. They are happening across Houston in broad daylight: in front of a junior high in Deer Park, in a busy Target parking lot near the Med Center, and just blocks from the Galleria, where Brinks guard Alvin Kinney was murdered during a robbery in 2015.

There are not enough police in Houston, Houston has the more police vacancies than any other city.

From hearing gunshots during the daytime, seen numerous street sex workers when they have largely disappeared in most urban areas, and heard numerous tales of violent and property crimes from Houston residents and natives. It’s one of the most dangerous urban areas that I have ever been in, and I used to live in both New York City and Chicago. The above are among the the reasons that I believe the Houston area to be dangerous, and I would be wary if or when I decide to return to the region.

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7. Diverse but not that Diverse

Yes, Houston is the most diverse city in terms of racial distribution, but not in terms of Ethnic Distribution. All the Hispanics are either from Mexico or El Salvador, All the Blacks are either Black American or Nigerian, East Asians are either Vietnamese or Chinese, South Asians are either Indian or Pakistani, you get my drift. Compare that to New York, where you have people from literally every part of the World.

And for the most part the ethnic enclaves suck, Public transportation is bad, the weather is usually too hot,  and the streets are very pedestrian unfriendly, so your not going to really experience this diversity like you would in other cities like New York, or Los Angeles. Unless you want to stare at people in their cars.

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8. Pathetic Sports Teams and Stadiums

Houston Texans is one of the worst teams in the NFL, and they play in one of the most ugliest stadiums ever, and to add insult to injury, despite Houston being the 4th largest city in the U.S they do not even have a hockey team, the only city out of the top 10 Metros not have a hockey.

9. Not Many good University Choices – Especially State University Choices

There is no University of Texas system in Houston.

The University of Houston and its supporters, meanwhile, felt like the UT System was encroaching on UH and threatening the upward trajectory of that school.

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10. Are you the biggest city in Texas or not?

11. Terrible Suburbs –

Houston’s suburbs are generally whack, there is nothing but houses in and random strip malls in them. Everything that is worth having is in the city of Houston. When you compare it to suburbs of cities like Washington,D.C, Los Angeles, Dallas, Miami, and even Detroit, where you have strong suburbs at almost feel like their own cities in their right. And it make it worse so many of them are unincorporated. So there are millions of people living in a places with no real names or local government. It is the county that provides services in these unincorporated communities.

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12. Broken School district

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13. Car accidents

Houston has more car accidents than any city. And is the worst city for pedestrians

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14. Poor infrastructure – Particularly lights that to go out

Seems to be largely a Houston problem. I’ve never seen storms take out traffic signals elsewhere as often as I have in Houston. Houston is the only place I’ve been where half the damn traffic lights go out whenever there is a shower. It’s insane. Why can’t the city get this right, being the hometown of technological behemoths like NASA, the energy industry, and the Medical Center

Obviously the engineers here don’t know why either, or they presumably would have fixed it by now.

14. Most Obese

One thing that me houstonians say when they are countered with this topic of being a very boring and dull Sue is that O Houston is not boring we have tons of restaurants as if restaurants make any city unique sure that may be restaurants from a diverse array of different countries but that is me thing I thought 1 of the of your only pastime is to sit there and go to restaurants the shows that your city is not really exactly a fun city no city braces it’s worth on the number of restaurants it has anyways can speak in a restaurant’s Houston since Houston is poorly planned no poet transportation very spread out and must you a sinner cars Houston has for a long time been traditionally ranked D fattest are 1 of the fattest cities in the United States

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15. Smog

Houston glad to let L.A. keep smog title

16. Mosquitos

The pest control services company listed the top 25 cities with the highest number of mosquitoes, ranking Houston No. 4 behind New York City and Washington D.C.

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17. High Property Tax

18. Crappy beaches

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19. So many toll roads

3rd most expensive toll road in America

20. Culture of Mediocrity

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Look at Houston’s skyline after 30 years

an shot of i45 Gulf fwy with the Houston skyline on the left. taken 31 years  apart. : r/OldPhotosInRealLife

Conclusion

It is not only us that recognize it, but Houston was recently rated the worst city in the United States. Houston is a transit city, many people that come here don’t stay for long. Give them 5 years max and they can’t take it anymore and leave.

Has potential to be so much better, but is not because of a culture of mediocrity. Houston was named the worst designed city . Skyline hasnt really changed since 80s. In synopsis Houston has the worst designed city, has the most accidents, most burglaries, used to have the worst smog. No light rail system coming, No hockey team coming, No theme park. Mediocre Airport not great flight deals,etc, etc.

How Houston can be better

Build a train line, Incorporate suburbs and turn them into real cities. Plan better drainage system. Make city more walkable, by building more sidewalks. This will help many ethnic neighborhoods more walkable like a bazaar. More media presence

The things that make a town a city- rapid transit, walkable neighborhoods, a full pro sports gamete Houston is without. We’ve got L.A.’s traffic, Chicago’s crime, Miami’s hurricanes all mixed in with Jacksonville’s, Charlottes, or Indianapolis blandness.

To paraphrase the blue-eyed singer of “New York, New York,”  if you can make it there, you can make it anywhere, but if you can’t there’s always Houston.

Me, when people say Houston is not boring, because they have restaurants.

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Me:Ghostface

Houston: Lady in White dress

Join the Conversation

5 Comments

  1. I agree with literally everything you said except for “Indianapolis’s blandness.” Blandness?! Have you been there? There’s more to do on Indy’s Mass Ave alone than their is in the entirety of Houston! Anyway, otherwise great article. 😛 Houston sucks.

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    1. Yes Indianapolis is Bland and hell no, it is not as interesting or as fun as Houston. You and the writer are either boring people or consistently depressed to feel this way.

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  2. Dumbest internet blog of all time. You are what’s wrong with society, complain but don’t take part in a solution. By the way if you actually engage you would understand the city dynamics and much of what you state culture wise is NOT true.

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  3. So true houston is extremely boring for how big it is u ask people what’s there to do for fun they usually say the galleria or a restaurant any city has a mall and restaurants houston socks im heading back to LA so many things to do only pro in houston is diversity cons to many to list

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  4. I agree with everything you said. Haha! It’s just a big bag of the crappy things has life to offer. Good food though so I won’t take that away from Houston. Probably explains the obesity.

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